Preface:
Those warriors brave enough to ride a mongoose into battle know all too well the great risk of doing so. Despite its diminutive and unthreatening stature, members of the other team take intractable interest in interring these beautiful, hard-crafted machines.
Not just anyone can put on a helmet and boots and contribute to the cause. The UNSC only accepts the best of the best; if you’ve played Halo online, you know this. Do you know, though, what fate befalls those Spartans that wash out of the program? I do. The UNSC puts them to work in production factories, working on essential equipment such as the mongoose.
These dedicated heroes toil for hours to get every mongoose just right! Many of them take great pride in the extra bells and whistles they install, pointing out that they even make sure to include a perfectly functional horn on every unit. Unfortunately, these precious machines rarely exit combat scenarios in working order.
Considering this, I believe we as a community of Mongoose appreciators must immediately insist on a number of minor modifications to our beloved contraption. Please underscore your support for these field-levelers!
#5 - Mongoose Hologram
For whatever reason, the other team cannot resist the lure of the Mongoose. We must implement a means to capitalize on their lust for wanton destruction! A simple hologram that distracts the enemy team for just a moment will give you the time you need to drive through battle without impediment.
#4 - Monstergoose
Although the mongoose’s petite size helps to give it some of its charm, it also needlessly subjects it to grave danger. Thus, we shall take the ordinary Mongoose and increase it to 5 times its original size. The final product will crush enemy combatants even more readily than a tank!
#3 - Frag Grenade Waypoint
In my experience, if you want to find the safest location on a map, you should find a frag grenade map ordnance and hide there. After all, who ever goes to collect frag grenades? Nobody, that’s who. We can use the same logic to add security to the Mongoose; if we place a frag grenadde ordnance marker above the mongoose as it motors around the map, most players will simply ignore it.
#2 - Wagon
Everyone loves to ride on the Mongoose. That it only supports 2 passengers at a time, then, strikes me as quite the shame. Hitching a wagon to the back of a Mongoose would solve this problem quite beautifullly. In addition to having more room for teammates to ride, you could also use it to gather enemy bodies and return them to your base for additional analysis.
#1 - Jetpack Mongoose
The Mongoose checks in at a very svelte 250lbs. Truly, it represents the pinnacle of UNSC engineering efforts. Considering its light weight, then, any player who mounts the Mongoose whilst wearing a Jetpack should have the option to use that Jetpack to make the Mongoose fly. If both the driver and the passenger would equip a Jetpack, the Mongoose could sustain flight virtually forever as the 2 players took turns recharging their Jetpacks. Naturally, I do not need even to begin to mention the additional potential should some of the wagon riders themselves also equip the Jetpack.
