The Winter: A Halo Fanfiction

Community General Discussion
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Read it on Wattpad

Read it on Fanfiction.net

Originally posted on Fanfiction.net, The Winter is a story of two brothers. Damien and Adam. When Adam goes MIA in the city of New Vancouver, Damien is put through a very different branch of the Spartan program. Now walking blindly into the underground world as an undercover agent, Damien must find his lost brother, before someone else finds him first…

This was my first story I ever wrote. It has been on the internet since August 3rd 2013. You may find that there are many typos and other issues of the sort but that is because it is a work in progress. When it is finished and perfect, it will be distributed as a free PDF file for everyone to download and enjoy. I really hope you can give the story a chance the way it is. And remember that all criticism is welcome so long as it’s constructive.

The Winter news 6/22/2014

So. It’s been three months since the last update. (I apologize to my loyal fanbase.) And I wanted to let you guys know that this book is still happening.

It’s been almost a year now since I started working on The Winter and it certainly has been a great year indeed. In the past months thanks to everyone that is reading, I have matured as an author. My writing is getting better all the time and I owe it all to you guys!

The Winter’s progress

As some of you may know, the first few chapters were rewritten in the early days of 2014. (If you haven’t read the 2014 version, you should go read it.)

Now the 2014 version was OK, but it still isn’t good enough. I am hard at work trying to insure the story has depth and almost no typos (a little unlike the way it is now.)

So! All I’m saying is, even though it’s imperfect, try and give it a chance. And please, for the love of god leave feedback!

The Winter news 7/3/2014

The Winter is now in Wattpad! Link is above.

Here is some things I am fixing in the next Winter re-write.

-Putting characters in proper character (Palmer etc.)
-Making humans speak like humans (“We are going upstairs”-“We’re heading upstairs”)

More news to come soon! Stay tuned dudes and dudettes!

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I only had time to read the first page, but I liked the premise so far. I really like the characters and I have every reason to believe that they will be fleshed out even further in the other parts.

I do have a bit of criticism, though. First, there are quite a few run-on sentences on the first page, and poor grammar is a really easy way to lose a reader’s interest.

Secondly, I think the story is really fast paced, in the beginning anyways. What I mean by that is that there isn’t much detail or much insight into the thoughts of the character. I know that’s hard when you write in the 3rd perso. I get it, my most recent fanfic was in 3rd person, but when you do include that insight the story will benefit greatly from it.

The first few paragraphs seemed more like a summary than a story. It’s a lot better to have 5 pages tell a story in less than an hour than 1 page tell a story in 5 hours. Now, there’s definitely an extreme to that, so you don’t want to explain every single move of the protagonist.

Overall, I liked the characters, and I think that the relationship between the two brothers is a great way to describe combat. If this isn’t necessarily the final draft, then I’d polish it up, find out what’s important to the plot and what’s not, and re-release it. I think the story you weaved has a LOT of potential to be riveting and dramatic. Practice is the best way to get better at anything, especially writing. =)

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Thanks for taking the time to write a review. I agree that the story is fast paced and in a way its hard to avoid that. Hovever I plan on taking this story a long way and then when I am done I will probably rewrite it. I hope that you end up reading the rest because as the story goes on I will become better at writing and the story will slow down. This is just the beginning.

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what I meant by the story will slow down is that there will be more insight to the characters thoughts and actions you learn more as the character grows And progress’

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Part 2, Chapter 2 uploaded guys. Read it now!

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Guys. I am now running a cover art contest you can win a Microsoft money card (points). See Need Artists! thread for details.

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Your story so far on the 1st page is GREAT!!! I’m going to continue reading, but I have the same criticisms that ZnaZnaZ has. You nailed the characters, the scene, and I like your forshadowing with the Prometheans.

If I had one more criticism to add though, add more sass to Palmer’s character just for authenticity.

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I’m actually now inspired to write a fan-fiction of my own. I’ll start drafting after I finish my final for the artwork.

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> I’m actually now inspired to write a fan-fiction of my own. I’ll start drafting after I finish my final for the artwork.

It’s actually a lot of fun.

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Hey guys, me again. Just wanted to give you an update on The Winter’s progress.

Damien is about to embark on an operation with his new stealth team “Sigma”.
He is on a personal mission to find his brother Adam who has gone MIA in the city of New Vancouver. After a year and 6 months of training and augmentation to become a spartan 4, he still has conflicting thoughts about Adam’s location. Is he still out there after all this time? Can he still be found? Does fireteam Theta even exist?

Find out by following The Winter as it progresses. You can start by reading Part 3, Chapter 2 on thanksgiving this week.

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Hey guys, due to lack of time (and managing The cover art contest) The Winter Part 3, Chapter 2 will be released at 12:00am eastern time. And if it’s not released then, it will be relesed the day after.

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The Winter Part 3, Chapter 2 is live! read it now!

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Hey guys, you can still follow @thewinter100 on Twitter but I would advise against it. I have lost access to that account so if you want to stay up to date on The Winter, just follow @PariahFADE.

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The next part of The Winter should be out by Wednesday. Stay tuned, there may or may not be a plot twist!

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Update: Ok so I have been having lots of computer trouble and I am afraid that the next part won’t be out for quite awhile. :frowning: I am really sorry guys I know how inconsistent I have been.

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Update: Hey guys, my computer is trashed so I bought a Windows Surface and I can finally start writing again. To be perfectly honest I wish there was more interest in my stories because when I start working on settings that I actually created I want people to read them. I know I haven’t been as good as I could have been but if You guys stick around, I promise it will be worth your while. Thanks.

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Please ignore this post and keep scrolling. -Pariah FADE

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Update: Release date of part 4 Chapter 2. December 25th. I still need to wrap up the art contest so yeah…

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> Update: Release date of part 4 Chapter 2. December 25th. I still need to wrap up the art contest so yeah…

Speaking of which, when was that going to end?

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> > Update: Release date of part 4 Chapter 2. December 25th. I still need to wrap up the art contest so yeah…
>
> Speaking of which, when was that going to end?

I kept extending the date because of the lack of submissions but the contest has to end eventually. I chose December 25th to be the final date to give time for late submissions and for anyone who needs to finish their work. Quality improves with time.