The Sith Empire is back!
And you’d be forgiven for thinking we were dead…or not. After a journey strife with turmoil and inactivity, after the coming and going of countless command staff, we’re returning to the fray, jumping into engagements on Halo 4, BF4, and GTA. We’re roaring to kick some rebel -Yoink- and have a damn nice time in the process, if I may say so myself. We are looking for able-bodied men and women with quick trigger fingers and quicker minds to form our newly-formed Halo squadron, so that we may expand our imperialist grasp over yet another battlefield.
We need men and women capable of communicating and working together in a tight-knit team. Age? We do prefer people over the age of 15-16, however we do make the occasional exception for those few who are mature enough under the limit. You are no doubt here, however, and thinking to yourself : ‘Just what can these guys offer me?’
Well, there’s the opportunity to kick even more -Yoink- than the recommended daily amount, clan battles, raids, gamenights, meetings consisting of lots of talking. And the occasional severely fractured vertebrae. It’s all fun in the Empire! You also get to be part of something called a ‘community’, which is another one of those things that hippies keep preaching on about, along with something to do with ‘deforestation and pollution’. Yeah, I don’t get it either.
And let’s not forget about our website and forums, found here: The Empire, which is under review for update, but is perfectly functional. So you should probably go sign up and post here: New to the Site? Post here (Required). Like right now. Seriously.
So join up on the website today to receive your free cookies and your one-way ticket to badassery! (And tell em’ Savage sent you!)
So, in recap, if you like the following, you should join up:
- Being a badass
- Severely fractured vertebrae and various other painful injuries
- Empire-y stuff, like, conquering things. Lots of things.
- Being part of the single most badass group of people since the last single most badass group of people ever (who were totally stealing our ideas, by the way)
- Having nice titles and ranks and things like that. Also medals. Lots and lots of medals. So now you too can have that gold star you always wanted! (Or a silver one, whatever floats your boat)
- Talking about what would have happened if Ghandi had nukes. We consider ourselves part-time philosophers, I’ll have you know.
- Raiding and battling against other clans in testosterone-fueled competition to see who really is the most badass.
- And everything else that I forgot to put in!
Join Today And Become EMPIRE!
LEGAL NOTICE: We do not endorse any of the following:
-Crushing indigenous populations
-Stamping out freedom and happiness throughout the galaxy
-Usage of bioweapons
-Wearing black garments
-Coffee mugs with ‘I Love The Empire’ printed on the side
-Various other assorted things