Halo Gods, I’m hearing that everyone is having problems with online play when plugging multiple consoles into one router. Are you kidding me???
I’m about to invest about 1,000 dollars just to get my Halo 5 fix in, but this is making me rethink my decision like a -Yoink!- about to cut off his -Yoink!-. I’ve been waiting to come back from Halo retirement and this sounds like old Halo all over again when the integrity of online play was being ruined by intentional “laggers” and 15 year old virgins refusing to play as a team with random donkey punches. I wish I could walk into the 343’s main office or jerk off on every employee that decided to crush my Halo excitement that made being unemployed fun. Maybe I’m being overly dramatic. Excuse me while I reove this loaded pistol out of my mouth.
Halo Gods, if you hear me now… Please bring back the excitement that once was. Bring back the flawless experience, like a professional BJ from an older woman. I just want to have my weekends occupied by a great online play among friends with chips and a possible shot of alcohol by my side to drown the pain of life’s responsibilities. Halo is life, or so I thought it was. Time to burn my adult Halo pajamas and throw them into a pit of fire along with my Master Chief underwear and Spartan stuffed dolls.
Halo gods, don’t ban me for my pain. Halo gods, give me a sign of good things to come. Halo gods, don’t push me down this dark path. In the name of First Person Shooters, Bungie, and the Holy Master Chief, AMEN.
x the dean x