I thought I had fixed it. I thought that switching to my 5ghz connection and upgrading my ethernet cords helped. Nope.
I thought changing my DNS helped. Nope
I thought assigning a static IP and port forwarding had helped. Nope.
I thought plugging into my router would help. Nope.
I have tried everything I have learned in my 20+ years of being around networks and tech. It has left me with one conclusion:
Its not me, its the servers. And it BLAAAAAM sure aint bad actors, since the lag happens in custom games with just me and bots.
I give up.