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*Original post. Click at your own discretion.
(DIS-claimer: I FULLY EXPECT FEW OR NO ONE TO READ THIS, IT IS A RANT BY A GRIZZLED, JADED OLD MAN WHO ONCE BELIEVED WEEPING AND SOBBING THIS IS REAL-TALK SO STRAP IN FOLKS!)
343 Industries, pls, stahp, pls…STAHP! Why you do me like this?
Just give us back proper firefight ala ODST and Reach. With microtransactions/REQS usable in it and make a really in-depth score attack for the campaign with microtransactions/REQs usable in that too. Warzone is trash.
The Grunt Goblin is really cool, I hope it becomes a permanent enemy type. It is nice to see you not take yourselves so seriously for once, ala Prometheans who are like a boring bullet sponge ripoff of the crap I might see in Michael Bay’s Transformers. #GenericScifiBadrobots
If prometheans are still in for Halo 6(violently writhes on the ground vomiting black tar just at the thought of it) then please make them more interesting and unique instead of “Hey! It’s the boring, lame enemies you know and hate, except now they have PURPLE AND PINK detailing cause Cortana!”
Why did you guys not go with the work-in-progress UI? It was clearly way better and looked cooler.
Why didn’t you commit to the storyline portrayed in the marketing? You want respect but you don’t deserve it, you’re just riding coattails. You are treading water afraid you might not reach the shore so instead you just panic and stay there drowning.
Why does the menu music get so FCKING loud? It is too loud and the music isn’t great enough to warrant bursting my eardrums.
Why do I have to sell REQS 1 by 1? It is tedious!
WTF is the purpose of the rally warthog? You cannot even sit on the back like the transport warthog?
Whoever thought of the map-remix idea, is a complete and utter moron. You could get away with this if there was already a wide variety of maps, but there isn’t. All there is is forgettable maps that feel like they’ve been cookie cuttered out of campaign levels and then duplicated so I am playing the same crap over and over. It is objectively boring.
Please add more maps to Infection like Roebuck Cove and Freakshow. I am tired of the same old same old.
Why have you taken away more feautures than you have added since taking over Halo?
Why do you think I need to see obnoxious loading screens over and over and over and over saying “REACH, KID” and telling me how to noob combo when I’ve been playing Halo since CE released? CHECK YO SELVES! btch slap
I want to simply play the game I have paid for and enjoy it, I have zero interest in being some little tryhard 14yrld “pro” acting like a big toughie. You have catered far too much to the ‘pro’ players! BRING BACK ALL THE GAMETYPES YOU TOOK AWAY AND CREATE A SOCIAL PLAYLIST THAT LET’S US PARTY-UP AND VETO AND TALK DURING MATCHMAKING!
Bring back split-screen! here, have another -Yoink!- slap
HIRE MARTY O’DONNELL! SAVE US MARTY! BUNGIE DOESN’T WANT YOU ANYWAY! #Sellouts, #Activision, #LostTheirWay
P.S. If Sarah Palmer doesn’t die a gruesome death, preferably right at the beginning of Halo 6 by an A.I. controlled microwave, you go to hell.
Drops the mic.