I am sad. Woe is me. Oh sob. Oh cry. (Off-Topic)

HIt has been a week since my devilish nephew annihilated my Master Chief controller by “”“accidentally”"" pouring off brand apple soda all over it while I was out taking a walk.

A week without Halo. I’m stranded in a desert of boredom. Water and food supplies are running low. My application for Walmart sent via courier pigeon has not been heeded. I am withering away.

Halo Gods, spirits of 343, Mister Chief. If this really is my last days on this humble Earth, I send my deepest apologies. For I will leave a microscopic void in a vast fabric Filled with raunchy custom games with random strangers, angry messages after stacked games of Breakout with friends, and hours upon glorious hours of teabaggery.

I bid the all farewell.

Huurgh … Blaby

Okay, in all seriousness, my little nephew wrecked my controller, so because of lack of anything else to do, I just decided to whip this out of my face out of pure boredom as a little joke.

Mods, enjoy and lock as you please, and I hope everybody else who might stumble upon this garbage have a wonderful day. <3

Why don’t you just get a new controller? Or use the one that came with your One?

> 2533275014371821;1:
> Okay, in all seriousness, my little nephew wrecked my controller, so because of lack of anything else to do, I just decided to whip this out of my face out of pure boredom as a little joke.
>
> Mods, enjoy and lock as you please, and I hope everybody else who might stumble upon this garbage have a wonderful day. <3

So you know you aren’t supposed to post this non-sense and you did it anyway?