Halo Fanfict.

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1

Hello everyone!

I’ll be posting my fanfic here… and there may be inconsistencies but I’ll do my best to make it relevant to Halo lore… it’s just really interesting these days.

--------Halo: Prison-----------

As the 6’4” tall middle-aged prisoner sat within his cellblock number 34, inside the new prison that was colloquially known to the higher-level ONI personnel as “New Voi Prison”, overlooking the recently excavated massive Forerunner artifact on Earth. He was one of the fortunate prisoners to have an open view to the massive artifact. In his orange overalls that complimented nicely to his strong but agile build, there was a tag on the right side of his chest, “Mark Gerald”.

In his thirties, he never expected to end up in a prison, after complying with Commander Richard Lash’s order to escape back to Earth, apparently due to the breach of the Cole Protocol when he was inside the UNSC Prowler Dusk when he witnessed an entire planet dissolving into innumerable numbers of sentinels, and his shock at the ease and little time it took the Onyx sentinels to ruthlessly slaughter the Covenant fleet that was just victorious moments ago, that had annihilated the UNSC fleet defending the “Planet” Onyx. His commanding officer Richard Lash ordered him to prepare the ship for the slipspace travel to Earth. At the time, Mark

Mark then wondered about how the strange unknown memories that were not his kept coming to his mind, given by the sight of the unknown number of Onyx Sentinels wiping out the Covenant fleet, he witnessed memories of being on a deck of an unknown ship, watching the small task force of unknown large ships that were larger, but had similar shape to UNSC frigates that he knew of, and he witnessed one of the large ships, shooting the similar round to bright blue variant of a MAC cannon, as though desperate to blind, if not destroy one of the massive ships which similarly resembled the Covenant-controlled planetoid High Charity. He witnessed innumerable amounts of small ships clearly of Forerunner design that seems to match with the Forerunner buildings, explode out of the ship, like the pollens exploding out of the flower, and danced around the light beam, and bombarded the unfortunate ship with seemingly small haze of lasers. Like a scalpel easily piercing the human skin, the lasers penetrated the same ship, destroying it’s generator within, causing the ship to explode, taking the small ships that were no larger than the 3km long UNSC carriers with it to oblivion. This memory lasted for a moment prior to the Slipstream jump.

Mark looked around and noticed none of the crew member experienced memories, only he as he was standing by the window that allowed him to see and witness the space battle of Onyx where Sentinels wiped out Covenant fleet with ease. He noted these sentinels took on similar formation as the unknown number of small ships that destroyed and swarmed around unfortunate ship that fired back in his memory. He looked at those strange memories and noted the small ships that were the complement of these huge ships but clearly resembled the Forerunner design, which he guessed these huge ships as well as their smaller ships that came out of the huge ships were part of the Forerunner Empire. But whom they were fighting? And who was the person in the deck, witnessing the bright destruction of one of two ships?

This is just the start… I hope you enjoy this.

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This memory remained prominent within this prisoner when the female prisoner in the next cell on his right called out his name “Mark, how are you these days? Had fun with us innies?” she said in a provocative tone to push Mark into yelling at her in a tone of the voice on his pro-UNSC stance and insult her insurrectionist affiliation. It did harm him and almost destroyed his career in a similar manner to Cole’s career similarly taking downturn due to Lyrenne Calista. Mark was very sensitive to these topics. He just remained quiet, with the sad weary look. That look had silenced his ex-girlfriend and as she looked around, other prisoners in their cells looked at her with an angry look, even her Insurrectionist friends who would’ve supported her only looked upon her with shame and anger. His ex-girlfriend saw him for the first time in three years, disbelieving his recent actions, and believing them to be frauds or propaganda by the UNSC as fellow prisoners affiliated with Insurrectionists who told her this ten years ago, had cited their sources to be from a UNSC.

Mark’s only response tempered with weary, sad tone “Nothing new, It would be nice if someone could already shoot my head in.” Which one of the Insurrectionist prisoners said “’Mandy, don’t be hard on your ex. Just leave him alone. He evacuated rest of us, despite he was in our territory. We didn’t believe the stories about him either, when he arrived. Didn’t believe him when he warned us and we didn’t listen ‘till then. That was when we were readying our ships to destroy his fleet that he requested us to allow him and his forces to land peacefully anyway. Seeing no threats was made, nor any of his ships getting ready to fire on us. Some of our strategists looking at the pattern of the ships noted they were not here to attack us but seemed to be on the run, so we allowed him to land his forces here. In three hours, that was when his super-carrier attacked one of his own UNSC ships that was incoming as our initial reports stated.

We were confused until we heard his open broadcast, “We have the flood incoming! Triangulate upon UNSC Hammer of Thor and destroy this ship. We may have purged the naval database but I think the cleaning crew was infected!” Which we immediately saw on the star maps that his small fleet was firing upon the oncomimng ship. It was bizarre and we were about to investigate the possibility that the well-known Co. Mark was sympathetic to our cause until we saw the covenant cruiser on a collision course to our planet, which was unusual. It was when he settled our forces among us, entrenching. And we saw his reasoning when the damaged covenant ship that looked partly out of place, with bits of brown covering the areas…We realized it was Flood infected, our first time seeing it, but we could see on the UNSC troops’ faces, they perspired, looking nervous, and they were actually scared. And they even handed out weapons. I - I won’t go any further” which another prisoner said to his short tale “Hedy’s right, I was there when the Flood arrived and already, they began to infect everyone they could find. We saw High Charity in the skies but it just ignored us and kept moving towards Earth. I was there for the several weeks, and Hedy here almost got infected on the godforsaken planet right before we finished evacuating civilians and began to evacuate our troops. One of my Marines sacrificed himself to save this guy. Hedy was important as he led the Insurrectionist forces to help us as we evacuated the civilians. He could see we were unwilling to bombard this planet, even though we could’ve done it. I’d say the Great War had changed all of us. We do prefer facing Covenant than to face the -Yoink!- Flood. Our commander, Mark, was traumatized. He kept trying to save as many as he could, even them Innies. We don’t know what happened to him but he was one of few dozens survivors when we took him in from planet Argos two years ago.” Hedy looking at the prisoner who replied “Wait, Daniel, did you say Argos? That was one of our worlds, we had no signal, what happened? Did you guys bombard it?” Which Daniels replied “No, we came when there was distress signal, we were skeptical until we saw most of planet was covered in the Flood biomass. We had to evacuate as many as we could, and as quickly as we could. Your friends there kept begging Mark to bombard this planet. He just kept evacuating until the reports were given that there was no more to evacuate, as rest of the people still trapped, are lost cause. Mark was anguished but gave his word and ended up bombarding Argos completely, those left behind. I could see on the deck he was looking far more anguished and tormented. He looked far worse when the Flood hit here, and had infected city of Voi before being glassed by the Elites”

Hedy nodded “I heard about that…” They continued to talk for some time. While Amanda was quiet and surprised, and seeing the friendly look between Hedy and Daniels, as though they were brothers despite being on the opposite sides, she looked to Mark and she said quietly “I’m so sorry…”

Mark remained quiet during their conversations as he remembered looking to the City of Voi that was recently bombarded. It had signs of battles and was reminded of that day he was almost infected by the Flood when he was with the Marines in Voi. It was when he heard, not through his ears, but his mind, Shaping sickness…? On Erde-Tyrene? How did the Shaping Sickness come to Erda? He remembered the sight of flood-controlled Covenant cruiser crashing near the city of Voi, and then High Charity in orbit, moving quickly towards the Portal which the presence within him said So you were fighting the Covenant. Not the Forerunners, but unlike us, you have won this Human-Covenant war. This is nothing compared to the great terrible conflict that spanned over hundreds of thousands star systems a hundred thousand years ago. The one you called the Flood, we have called them Shaping Sickness. The worst threat that had pushed us to take Forerunner’s star systems closest to ours, and the Shaping Sickness was far worse than the Forerunners. Our Political and Morale Commander of all human forces, Yprin,had us study the Forerunners when we were fighting the Shaping Sickness… The presence showed Mark the memory of the tall tough woman. He was surprised to see her as a human being. We were fighting two-fold war, and I was Lance Admiral of Erda’s Core Defense Fleet and I have faced both Forerunners and the Shaping Sickness. We have survived Shaping Sickness! But not the Forerunners after. We kept the cure and rest of data away from the Forerunners and they were unaware that our reasons for taking these worlds irrationally was due to the Shaping Sickness infecting so many of our worlds. They thought it was our excuse! We needed more worlds for our people, and we ended up killing far more than I would’ve liked… The presence within him felt sad, weary and regretful. My people continued to believe in creating many souls, most of them, but after my experiences, almost getting infected and seeing horrors at the forefront, I had stopped believing in the gods, and astrology… What a -Yoink!- waste of time… My advice to you, kid, is don’t waste time thinking and believing in the false gods that my people believed in, and astrology… don’t think about using it. What a -Yoink!- waste of time filled with superstitions.

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I hope you don’t mind me posting here. This looks like it’s off to a pretty good start, there’s just some rough edges that need working on. A few of the sentences feel really packed with detail. Try evening them out to multiple paragraphs, maybe use some creative imagery. Also, one very basic tip: Read a lot; write a lot. You’ll get the hang of it soon.

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I don’t mind you posting here, any help’s appreciated. I’m just reading up all these on the books I have on Halo. Character limit does suck… Will edit more and then add more story when it’s done. I’m just rereading whatever is in there.

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Mark could not believe the presence and he whispered to the presence “I find it hard to believe that you were once a human being like me-“ Not like you. Your people has the same black skin as my own people but we were bigger, taller, and stronger. Your Spartans have the same strength as our people, it seems for the past hundred thousand of years, that our species have changed so much, I no longer recognize it although your people were similar to my people. I suppose this is what the Librarian, of the Lifeshapers had promised me, so long ago… The voice was again, quiet, causing Mark to wonder and he whispered to himself quietly. “A hundred thousand years, huh?” The voice did not respond to this question.

Mark remained seated as he looked back at the first memory as he looked over to the Portal. He looked at the memory of the unfortunate ship. Thuron-class Heavy Prime Cruiser The old memory said. Thirty-five kilometres long, it was akin to a huge gun, I suppose similar to your UNSC frigates that sport… what do you call it? MAC cannons. A gun that was an answer for the infamous dreaded Forerunner Fortress-class behemoths. As I see UNSC had survived against technologically superior Covenant’s fleet of few dozen ships out of five hundred that were destroyed by one man’s sacrifice, a small price that wiped most of the ships according to the reports made by your Spartan hero, known as John-117. The entire fleets of five hundred Covenant ships at full strength are nothing but paperweight rabble. Our interstellar empire was far more advanced than the Covenant aliens, and our ships could wipe them out, at the same rate that Covenant had been known to easily destroy your ships and yet we dreaded the Fortress-class behemoths as each Fortress-class vessels had the might of an entire fleet, and the Prometheans were known to use it to great and terrible effectiveness, as though as we were nothing but mice facing their imminent death by being devoured by a mighty snake. Rare but terrifyingly effective, which is why Thuron-class Heavy Prime Cruiser was needed. Mark looked at the memories of Thuron-class Heavy Prime Cruisers, and indeed, they looked similar to the UNSC frigates, but they were much bigger, and as the memory indicated, it was thirty-five kilometres long, and it sported far more armor, covering even the front of the ship, making the front of the ship akin to the Marathon-class cruisers, with additional plating around the front, akin to the front of a pistol, with the sharp point head of the bullet at the tip of the exit whilst the back half of the ship corresponded with the UNSC Paris Heavy Frigate although more geometric in design and that ship had far superior energy shielding and the Thuron-class Heavy Cruisers had many turrets emplacement that fired plasma that acted in the same manner as the heatseekers. Mark noted in this particular memory, that the Fortress-class vessels looked like they had a capacity to fire a very powerful laser, and had hundreds if not thousands of guns, and he wondered in this case, how is it that the Fortress-class vessels were not using their lasers or their guns, seemingly preferring to use what the memory called, Forerunner picket cruisers to do the job onto the unfortunate Thuron-class Heavy Prime Cruisers. The memory said These Thuron-class Heavy Prime cruisers you’re seeing here were prototypes. It was a necessary sacrifice. A tactic, if you will, to test the prototypes as our later Thurons were more effective in dealing with the Fortress-class vessels. It was to feed the Forerunners the confidence, and let them underestimate the strength of the later Thuron-class Heavy Prime Cruisers. Indeed, increased confidence so often leads to the mistakes that can be exploited. That was one factor that brought us time during Human-Forerunner Wars, although this tactic ultimately became useless during the later stages of the war.

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So then… Anyone know a good place to post fan fiction? Fanfiction.net seems good. I’m wondering is… what are the sites you are more likely to look up to? I’m not sure if DeviantArt allows for stories, but I’d rathe not post there as it is mainly art. What are the ones that you guys are most likely to look up to?

Quidzilla looks good too. Should I post my Fanfiction story there?

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Good however dialoge is somewhat clunky. When ever I write dialoge or character interaction, i imagine that i am that person, or i just use first person perspectives for my story. However, your fan fic (Whats the title?) is original and well done so far with only a few things like grammar, sentence structure and dialoge needing improvement.

I suggest posting on Fanfiction.net btw

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The presence within Mark noted his curiosity about the memories he had. Mark then asked the presence, as though as he was addressing an ONI “Name and rank? And what is your purpose for being here?” He couldn’t help it as he was used to addressing the ONI operatives this way as all ONI operatives did when one met another in their respective missions/ONI locations such as CASTLE base in the planet Reach. Ah, your way of greeting a newcomer, is it? very well, my name is Kaivlin, Lance Admiral of Erda’s Core Fleet. And one of the last survivors of Admiralty. As my purpose for being here, it wasn’t really my choice….

Mark noted the tone of the inner voice and not reply. As this was still afternoon, in the New Voi Prison, Mark slowly laid down on the floor, in a fetal position that indicated other prisoners to lower their voices while conversing. It was understood among the prisoners, which Hedy looked at Amanda, Mark’s ex-girlfriend. “Just don’t interrupt him… UNSC and us innies tried our best to help him. I think he’s beyond help now, and I believe that’s due to the tragedies that occurred in the evacuation and from what I heard from Daniels regarding planet Argos.” While they understood Mark had Psychological trauma, they never knew what happened to Mark on the planet Argos.

As Mark perspired and closed his eyes, slowing his breath, as his heart beat faster as he never got over the events thanks to the Flood and his inability to save others, it was the only beginning as he ended up being dragged further into the old memories of the old presence within him.

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Kaivlin’s memory 1#

A hundred and ten thousand years ago, during the time of the Great Sadness, in a month of Tebetum, Kaivlin was running, breathing heavily. He wore green-black armor, which covered all of his body. His blue visor was geometrically rectangle spreading across his face. His armor was thick, seemingly made out of titanium itself. There was a small pack behind the armor that merged with his suit. It was useful, with the energy shielding being flexible, covering all over his body rather than the bubble-like state as was often with many warriors, with only the higher ranks possessing the armor like his, as the technology needed to create such armor with the advanced energy shielding was very expensive, and only the alliance with the San’Shyuum made this possible, as the recent research had advanced armor like Kaivlin’s. As of now, there is a current research in refining the techniques to create armor so the Central Charum Command can create variants of the armor or mass produce it to all human forces. Some say, this was to prepare for the eventual war against the Forerunners if the need should come to it.

Kaivlin looked behind himself, and pulled out the black intricately designed pistol, from the upside down holster attached to the lower part of the right side of his chest-plate. He then aimed the pistol to fire blindly at the back, at the darkness filled with some glowing green eyes in the long street corridor. The pistol’s holo-sight appeared on top of the pistol, but he did not wait for it to light up, not looking back and immediately fired various needle-like incendiary rounds. There were loud, shrill hellish screams, followed by the crackling sounds followed by the smells of the burnt flesh, yet the voices did not stop.

This prompted Kaivlin to keep running, for it didn’t take long that the shadows were broken by the armies of the dead bodies, decomposing, filling the air with the disgusting decay of rot. They were throwing rocks and some of them used training assault rifles to pepper him with bullets. His shields were draining at a fast rate. It wouldn’t be long before he would be wounded, vulnerable to infection, especially to Shaping Sickness.

Like a pack of hunters, the Sickness came after him, not caring if they were wounded, and left their own dead behind as they converged on him, only slowed down by the incendiary effect. All the bodies acted in concert, as if directed by the puppeteer to move the decayed puppets after Kaivlin. They all spoke with one voice “Give up running and surrender yourself to us.” And “Why run? Why not join us and share the unity among us?” while the speech were littered with the hellish, tormented screams of the lost souls, seemingly abandoned by the Gods which he no longer believed in, they were grinding to Kaivlin’s ears, as well as terrifying. It was as if a single presence, like an evil god wanted to devour him.

Kaivlin himself noted that those infected with the Shaping Sickness had total control over their bodies, and whatever the original minds that once inhabited these bodies were now either dead or absorbed by the Sickness. Those things terrified him far more than death, as being infected by the Sickness meant fate far worse than death.

Finally, Kaivlin could see the light of the stars at the exit, after long run from the underground traffic corridor. He then found himself at the end of the cut-off bridge, with the large building concrete-like rectangular building with four pyramidal long pylons at the right side, which the soft-light décor dotted the building, accompanied by the intricate designs of the light, similar to the lines on the old computer plastic-silicon-based designs that once existed several thousands of years ago, or so they taught him when he was in high school, at the distance that once served as a bank, causing him to cease firing for a brief moment, and then he turned around, prepared for his end, but determined to bring some of them down with him to death, he rose his arms and gripped his pistol, Three rounds left in the magazine, his helmet’s HUD indicated on the bottom right corner. He aimed his pistol at the darkness, which didn’t take long before the infected corpses spread out into the open from the tunnel.

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And besides, this is going to take me time to figure out how to describe the weapons, and armour… never easy for that, as drawings make it easier to explain. ._.

Edit: It’d be nice if anyone can make time to include corrected version of this story, as in grammar fixes somewhere in my story. I’d like to know where I’ve gone wrong, if it’s alright?

Besides, I’m trying to figure out how to describe the architecture of ancient humans, based on Heian and Forerunners as well as the UNSC style, and from the Cryptum as well as Primordium.

What are your thoughts so far on this story by the way? And should I continue on with Kaivlin’s memory? Or go back to present?

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http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8444236/3/Halo_Prison This is the link to my Halo fanfiction. Enjoy, as this will be easier for me to update and all. Going to take me sometime to get used to that website’s system.